There are some things that you think is normal but what you don't know is that those things are destroying your confidence, you think that it is ok to do this or do that but in the long run... those things will affect your confidence, your self esteem will become very low and they way you see yourself is very low.
Be careful of what you are doing because those little things can make your life hard. It can attract negative things that will avoid you from being successful.
1. Associating yourself with people who doesn't make you feel good. If there is a person in your life that all did was to make you feel bad by bullying you or making fun of you... it is time to stay away from that person. Do you think you will become confident if you were always being embarrassed or being the person who they make fun with? Of course not. There will always be people who will treat you right, the reason why you can't find them is because you don't stay away with the wrong people in your life. Let the wrong ones go and the right ones will come in.
2. Constantly comparing yourself with others. If you will always compare yourself then you will always find fault in yourself and that is a bad start if you are building your confidence. You are unique and different from them, you don't need to look who is good or not, you don't need to use others as a gauge to your success. You can define your own success, you don't need to look for others to see how are you doing. Because once you see yourself failing and others are succeeding... you will fee bad, your self esteem will go down.
3. Thinking about your failures in the past. Of what good does this kind of behavior can do to you? thinking about failures from the past is like repeating it again. You will remember how it feels to fail so your confidence will go down, you wouldn't want to try again because that memory of failing is always running inside of your head, it is destroying your confidence. Instead of remembering your failures, why don't you just think about winning and making it to the top?. Even if it hasn't happen yet, well at least you are feeling good about yourself.
4. Pursuing a goal and not continuing it. Pursuing a goal and not continuing it is like admitting to yourself that you are a coward and afraid of pain. It will destroy your confidence because you are developing a habit of going to a war and then going back home when the going gets tough. Pursuing a goal is hard but if you keep on quitting... you will become a coward forever, the warrior mentality in you will be erased. If you keep on doing it... your mind will be programmed that it is ok to quit, you will no longer have the confidence to continue in any situation that goes harder.
5. Making a declaration to the world that you will do something great but not starting it. People will think of you as a person who is only good in words and bad in taking actions, people will never trust you and that will also affect your confidence. People will make fun of you, they will always tell you that you are just about talk and the more you hear it, the more you believe it. You will no longer trust yourself that you can do something great. So the best thing to do is stop talking about greatness if you are not willing to commit for it.
6. Not doing anything. Being lazy and not doing anything is the number one confidence destroyer. Your mind will be occupied with doubts and fears because you are not improving. Inaction builds fear, action builds confidence. So if you want your confidence to soar high... work hard, do something productive that will make you better.
7. Imitating someone. You will not have your own identity. You will no longer trust your own skills because your skills were just copied from others. You get your skills from someone and by doing that... you are destroying your opportunity to show what you really got. People will compare you to the person you are imitating and of course they will tell you that the original was better and that kind of statement is a heartbreaker, your confidence will go down for sure. You will also not trust yourself if you have an original idea in your mind because you were so used to imitating, you are uncomfortable of expressing your own ideas.
8. Always seeking for appreciation. You must be ok if no one appreciates you because that is a sign of a strong person... not seeking for attention, because he knew he don't need it. If you were so used to being appreciated by people and when the time comes that they don't appreciate you anymore... you're in trouble. You will become depressed, you will lose your confidence. Your confidence should not come from others, it should start from the inside.
9. Not taking risks. Always playing safe is a sign of weakness, your confidence will go down because you are not familiar with discomfort. Taking risks will remove your fears, exposing yourself to failure will give you a feeling of being invincible. Take risks that are worth taking... it will give you a super high confidence.
10. Always agreeing with someone. You don't always have to say yes especially if what is being offered is not favorable to your side. Learn to say no even if it is difficult to say it so that you will feel that you have the authority to choose whatever you want. Always saying yes is like being a slave to security, you say it because you are afraid of altercations. Only say yes because you mean it and not because you are afraid that someone might get mad.
11. Being dependent. You always look for someone who will do things for you, how do you think will it help you in the long run? of course your confidence will go down, you will even lose the ability to take charge when needed. You won't even have the courage to do small things because you train yourself like a spoiled diva who can't even do any small and easy things.
12. Refusing to become a leader. Sometimes you have to lead because that will make you experience how it feels like to have a power. If they picked you to become a leader... accept it and use the benefits for being it. Refusing to become a leader means you are ok with just following others. There is nothing wrong with that but it means that you don't trust yourself.
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