December 17, 2016
THE NUMBER ONE SOURCE OF FEAR: PEOPLE
People is the number one source of fear and not circumstances. Why are you afraid to do something? is it because it is hard? or you are afraid that people might laugh at you or judge you?
Why are you afraid to take the shot? it is because you are afraid that you will miss or is it because the person guarding you is better, faster and stronger than you?
Why are you afraid to take the leadership role? is it because you don't have the skills or is it because you are afraid that your group members might not follow you?
Whether you admit it or not, the reason why you are scared is because of people. You were too afraid of what people might say. You are to scared of being judged and criticized. You are so scared to take the blame. You don't want to absorb any hate or form bashing from other people. And that is the main reason why you can't be yourself,
You have stage fright, why? is it because you are not prepared or you are too scared that people might laugh at you if something goes wrong? What if nobody is watching, will you still feel the same way? will you still be scared of making mistakes?
That is why there are lots of talented people who were only good in practice and were so bad during live performance. They become a different person when people are watching them. They were shaking, they don't know what to do, they feel like the audience were already criticizing their performance which is not true. They feel like all eyes were on them, they were so stiff and cannot express themselves. They cannot be themselves.
Why are you so afraid to fail? is it because failing is painful or is it because you don't want people to see you fail? If people will not know that you are failed, are you going to try again?
The truth is you're really not afraid to try, you just think that people were thinking something about you. You always think that they are laughing at you and counting you out, which is a wrong mindset because people doesn't really care. They don't care if you fail, they don't care if you suck. They were too busy living their own lives so don't ever think that they were always thinking about you because that is stupid. That kind or approach will only make you conservative and inexpressive.
If people were not watching do you think you can give your best? definitely yes. The pressure on your shoulders will go away, you will become loose because you're not scared anymore. You will feel free and you will be able to do what you wanted to do.
A group of people scares more than a single person. If there is only one person watching you and expecting you something, you will not be scared big time. But if there are hundreds of people watching you, for sure you will be scared to death. The pressure is higher because there are more expectations that needed to be met. So they key here is don't give them expectations nor don't think that they are expecting something from you.
Don't ever try perfection because that will only add some pressure to you. Just be yourself and do your best no matter what.
And also, always think that the people around you were not perfect too. They were no better than you and they have their own flaws too.